For many parents this is a happy time of year. In order words, you have spent 18 years raising a precious fledgling to be able to fly away to either work or attend another school.  But wait, all the feelings and confusion start coming up.  While parents might say the child owes them nothing and they just want the child to be happy, there is a common dynamic that can happen.  The parent is blind-sided by an “adult child” who instead of saying see you later simply says nothing or “good-bye”.

 

These young adults may still be using the parental wealth by continuing to be on the parents’ insurance, using parental money for school, or dropping their items off to a room in the parents’ home.  They are about to begin leading lives of their own.  They are trying to be with friends and always seem busy.  Some of the biggest arguments can seen when a parent finishes moving their new college students’ furnishings into the dorm. The parent looks longingly for the hug or see you later, but there is an awkward void.  So many emotions and yet nothing to say.

 

This is the beginning of early adulthood, and it can be exciting and tumultuous. Give it time, allow yourself to have, feel, and express your emotions. Get support.  Exercise it out. Write it out.  Just don’t pretend it won’t go away.